Daughter of the month

 As a father, I stand at the threshold of a world brimming with emotions, a realm where my daughter Diva, five and a half years old, navigates the ups and downs of childhood. Yesterday, her radiant smile was replaced by a cloud of disappointment when she didn't receive the coveted 'Student of the Month' award. Her heart sank, and her words echoed with the pain of unfulfilled expectations, "Dad, I couldn't get the award, and my friend got it. I always pay attention in the class and do all the assignments, and why I couldn't get the award?"

In that moment, I was reminded of the delicate balance between acknowledging her disappointment and fostering her emotional resilience. I could either dismiss her feelings or validate them, creating a safe space for her emotions to unfold. I chose the latter.

"Did your other friends get the award too?" I inquired gently.

"No," she replied, a glimmer of hope flickering in her eyes.

"See, other friends didn't get the award too, it's okay," I reassured her. "You keep working hard, and you will get it one day, but you should not be worried about it."

Her disappointment lingered, and I knew that more was needed. An idea sparked within me, a way to acknowledge her efforts and celebrate her intrinsic worth.

"Diva, I got a plan," I declared with a mischievous grin.

"What plan?" she asked, her curiosity piqued.

I leaned in and whispered, "I know you worked hard and you were very sincere, so how about I give you a 'Daughter of the month' award?"

Her eyes widened, a faint smile gracing her lips. "What will be the award?" she asked, her voice laced with anticipation.

"Well, what do they give to the student of the month?”, I asked. She replied “they give a bag of Starburst candies and a paper that states 'Student of the Month' and the name of the student."

I replied, “Okay, I am going to present you the same candy with the certificate that writes “Daughter of the month, Diva”.

Her smile broadened, and her eyes sparkled with excitement. "Really? Yay!" she exclaimed.

"Yes," I confirmed, savoring the joy that was returning to her face. "Next day, I pick you at school, I am gonna give you the same candy and a small paper that writes 'Daughter of the Month' and your name."

Her happiness was palpable as she hugged me tightly, tears of joy mingling with her radiant smile. "Dad, I am so happy, thank you for doing this. You are the best dad," she exclaimed.

The next day, as promised, I presented Diva with her 'Daughter of the month' award, a bag of Starburst candies and a personalized certificate. Her eyes lit up, and her smile radiated pure delight. It was a moment that transcended the confines of school awards; it was a celebration of her efforts, her sincerity, and her unique place in our family.

Diva's disappointment, though temporary, offered a valuable lesson in emotional intelligence and empathy. By acknowledging her feelings and creating an alternative source of recognition, I tried to sooth her immediate distress and instill in her a sense of self-worth that goes beyond external validation.

As parents, it is essential that we get committed to guiding our kids through the labyrinth of childhood emotions, fostering their emotional resilience, and shaping their understanding of the world around them. I too realized that how important it is to continue to seek out opportunities to validate our children’s feelings, celebrate their accomplishments, and provide them with the emotional scaffolding they need to navigate the joys and challenges of life.